Elephant Vs Jackass went on Vacation and I am well aware that I suck for not posting in two weeks, but I promise to win back your affections.

Ok, I am sorry I stopped posting for a couple weeks in the midst of one of the most important political decisions in our countries history. I was on vacation in places with little or no internet, and was unable to post, and frankly I think I was suffering from "electile dysfunction". Probably, like many of you, I had OD'd, on CNN, and MSNBC discussing the DNC and GOP on my TV. I was beginning to formulate advanced theories about Anderson Cooper being a cyborg, and Paul Begala and Dennis Kucinich forming an underground leprechaun army, and all sorts of other completely off the wall theories. But, after a little down time with the family in the woods, I am ready to steamroll through the rest of this election and beyond. Hopefully you'll forgive me, even if it's to late to 'pologize (hey). I'll make it up to you. I'll take you to a fancy dinner where I'll order us the cheapest bottle of wine possible, we'll both get drunk, and have hours and hours of hot and dirty make-up blogging...I'll pick you up at 8...where something nice.

So, with my apology out of the way, let me fill you in on my trip a little, and then we can move on to voter fraud, Joe the Plummer, Dress-me-up Caribou Barbie, and all sorts of other fun stuff. It was really interesting going back to the Midwest after pissing away here in Los Angeles for most of this election cycle. I had only seen pictures on TV of what a McCain/Palin bumper sticker or yard sign looked like. Frankly, I thought that maybe McCain and Palin were just mythological creatures, like Mormons. But, when I was traveling through Western Pennsylvania and into Northern Ohio, I saw a lot of McCain and Palin signs. Thankfully there are more than enough people in those parts that know that what this country really needs is an erratic, old-balls, self-proclaimed maverick for president, and a comedy writers dream come true waiting in the wings. Of course there were quite a few misguided souls who decided to litter their slowly browning lawns with Obama paraphernalia as well. Don't they know that this is Republican country? You know, the pro-American part of the country. Not the Anti-America part like where I live. Well, I had a very nice visit with my in-laws, and for the most part, adhered to my wife's rule that I could not talk about politics.

The second part of my trip took me to see my family in Michigan, which was astonishingly beautiful at the time with all the leaves changing. From the moment I got in the car with my Dad at the airport and started driving off, I could tell things were quite a bit different in Michigan than they had been in Ohio. Even in very rural area like where my parents now live, I could have hopped across the state from one Obama sign to another (if they weren't made of low-grade vinyl and Popsicle sticks). Even stranger than that was seeing my grandparents. My grandpa is 87 years old and has never in his life voted for a democrat. This year, he will.

Perhaps, that's what gets lost in the rhetoric of 'change'. In places like Michigan, where people have really been hit hard, people aren't just asking their government to change, their asking themselves to. It's easy to lose sight of what's really going on out there when you're living in a place like Los Angeles. In California, we change just for the sake of changing sometimes...wait, I changed my mind on that thought...nope...changed it again...we're ok now. But in the vast majority of the country, change takes a little bit more time to work it's way through the system - take for example all the people I saw wearing Ed Hardy shirts - Ed Hardy is so 2007. Seriously, people are in no hurry to keep up with the 'changing' ways of us California folks. Did you hear the new Bing Crosby album? It's killer.

The point is that, as divided as this country seems, we all seem to acknowledge that we need to change, as a country and as a people. It just takes a little longer for some of us to let go of our VCR's and 8-tracks. Ultimately, you don't do out and get a cell phone because everyone else is doing it, you get it because you think it can make your life easier and better. Change has certainly been accelerated during this election cycle, but as with everything, it does take time.